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The Teddy That Got Away by moogle
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The Teddy That Got Away

moogle

Making Plots: The Beginnings of a Nightmare

One cold, stormy night, in a not-so-far-away place known as rowangreenleaf's DG forum, a group of girls sat huddled together in the common room, discussing the horror of all horrors. Stuffed toys.

*Cue scary music*

However, these weren't just any stuffed toys. These were amazing stuffed toys, such as the sheep with a secret pocket (who would have known?) and Vicky's infamous cow-duck-though technically that one wasn't a stuffed toy…

In any case, toys were being discussed-and not so subtly stolen-and yet perhaps the most disturbing feature of all about this horrific night of hyper conversations and toy snatching was the discovery of a plot bunny; a Draco/Ginny plot bunny to be precise.

Draco Malfoy, believe it or not, had secretly been clinging to his childhood teddy. Yes, he even took it with him to Hogwarts. One day, much to his dismay, his teddy was 'toynapped' by some foul villain (who may or may not have red hair). He had only one choice. Retrieve his lost toy or die trying!

Starlit, the youngest of the quartet, showed a tendency to treat this idea with sarcasm, but the plot prevailed, and soon a challenge was being issued in which the four were bound to write the humorous bunny if they dared.

Upon discovering the pact, the Heads of House-particularly Ravenclaw's-could only shake their heads at such behaviour, but the plotters remained cheerful (it must be noted that no Slytherins were involved) and were unabashed by their love for ridiculous plots involving stuffed toys.

Alas, it was not meant to be. The sudden disappearance of Haz (it has been rumoured she may have been eaten by the sheep with the secret pocket) removed one plotter from the game, and the rest fell victim to a severe attack of goldfish syndrome and never mentioned the matter again.

The Horror of the Teddy-Nappers faded into the background, buried deep under even more disturbing tales of cannibal islands and Draco Malfoy's receding hairline (Handouts for Denial 101 will be left in the box by the door for those who need it) and for a while it seemed the plot bunny would never come into fruition.

Then one day a certain Ravenclaw realised that she was not a goldfish (she certainly was a clever one) and stretched her fingers with evil glee as she began writing the story that was destined to become the nightmare of all serious-minded D/G shippers.

I now present you with a copy of this chilling tale, but I warn you, it is not for the fainthearted. There is a stuffed toy, said toy will be kidnapped, and Draco Malfoy will lament the loss of his Snuggie bear.

You have been warned.